Sam I ain't

 

I do not like the hostel dorms

I do not like them in any form

 

I do not like sleeping in a bunk

And smelling other people’s funk

 

 

 

 

I do not like the late night noise

I do not like sleeping next to boys

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I do not like the lack of space

And all these children in my face

 

I do not like them calling home

On the speaker--where are their headphones?

 

 

 

I do not like rules that, I assume,

Are made to drive me from my room

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I do not like communal bum guns

I do not find them the least bit fun

 

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I do not like mosquitoes in my shower

Dengue fever makes me sour

 

 

I must admit I liked the price

And the staff was awfully nice

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Still… I hope I’m done with hostel living

Guess I’ve grown too posh and unforgiving